Saturday, November 10, 2012

What I have learned

I have been in the surrogate world for a long time and as I sit here, nearing the end of my surrogacy days (yes I know I've said that before but I feel in my bones that this is my last surrogacy...I really am done, finally), I realize what a gift the whole experience has been.  On a message board I belong to, there is a post about what we have learned as surrogates and as I was reading through the responses of others, I came across one response that totally sums up my feelings on surrogacy.  So courtesy of Susan, here's what surrogacy has taught me. 

I've learned the most gracious gift of my lifetime thus far,

I've learned how to let go and love at a distance. Being a surrogate mother has been some of the most beautiful and sad moments/days/months/years of my life!

I've learned that I've given back to the Universe what it gave me, life.

I've learned how to respect those opinions that may not be like mine.

I've learned that I've taught my boys a very deep meaning of giving to others.

I've learned that some feelings you experience in surrogacy just simply don't have words to express them.

I've learned that giving "life" was a gift I was meant to give to others

I see so many people talking about surrogacy lately.  It's the hot topic I guess.  But to those of us who've been around the surrogacy world for awhile it's not a hot topic, or the latest thing, or the new way that celebrities get babies.  It's just a part of our lives, this wonderful aspect of our already full lives.  For me, the time has come to move on.  I'm too old, my kids are too busy, my uterus has been occupied too many times and cut too many also.  I don't envy the new surrogates starting's a different world now and I fear government regulation is not too far down the road.  I think a part of me will miss surrogacy but a part of me will be relieved.  I can lose weight and get healthy and actually stay that way.  I can focus my time and energy on myself and my family.  But surrogacy will always be a part of my life.  There will be six babies in the world that I helped to create through surrogacy.  There will be four families that I helped to expand their definition of family.  Together these men and I not only grew babies, we made families, turned men into parents, turned parents into grandparents.  What a ride it has been. 

14 more weeks with the Canadian and my life will change forever.  For me there is no going back...who was I 8 years ago when I first explored surrogacy?  I was a mom to kids that ranged in age from 13 down to 6.  When I deliver my kids will range from 21 to 14.  I am excited to see what the future brings for me and my family and to see what the next adventure might be. 

1 comment:

  1. This is my favorite post of yours ever- and kudos to Susan for putting such beautiful truth into words.
    You are a pioneer Susan, in your choice of IPs and your choice of surrogacy.
    It is a beautiful gift, and I agree so fully that it is a gift to everyone involved.