Holy crap. Sometime in the next week to ten days I will have a baby. And that will be the last baby I will ever have. As the kids say...it's about time. 40 is kind of ridiculous to be still having babies (gotta love the honest truth from the mouth of 14 year old boys).
So how do I feel?
Anxious...about the c-section. I hate them. But after an hour of surgery and an hour of recovery, it's ok. Just have to get through those two hours.
Excited....for the guys. They sound so excited. I try to put myself in their shoes and just can't. It's been so long since I anticipated the birth of my first.
Ready...I am tired of the comments at work. I am tired of people misunderstanding the motivations behind surrogacy. I am just plain tired. I feel sorry for those who can look at surrogacy and only see the money. I am done being bitter or angry about it and now just feel sorry for them. I am glad that I can see all sides of most issues and don't go through life bitter and angry and judging others. I am glad i am not missing out on the joy in life like they are.
Tired...self explanatory. I have a busy life. I am not a spring chicken. I am 39 weeks pregnant. Enough said.
Sad/happy/nervous...also self explanatory. Sad that this is my last pregnancy and I will never feel this feeling again. Happy that this is my last pregnancy and I can move on and find out who I am again. Nervous that this is my last pregnancy and I have to move on and find out who I am again.
So that is it. I will post a pic in a few. The belly continues to grow. I had an ultrasound the other day and they estimated the baby at 6lb12 oz. I will be surprised if he is that small but you never know I guess.
Saturday, February 9, 2013
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Everyone
Everyone at work is sick
Everyone in town is sick
No big shock then that I have caught another cold. Fingers crossed it passes before the baby comes. I am less than amused but at least it is not the stomach bug that is going around.
I have an OB appt next week. It will probably be my last one as I don't usually do weekly appointments unless there is something wrong. How weird to know that I have less than a month of ever being pregnant. The Canadian continues to take whatever I throw at him without blinking.
Hubster wanted to go to a car show tomorrow but I don't think we will. It is 3 hours away and would involve a ton of walking. Not smart at 37 weeks pregnant. We can go next year. Instead we are going birthday shopping for boy #2 and going to see a movie...Mama...which looks really good and scary. We will be in the town I will deliver in all day so that is good just in case something happens, which I'm sure it will not.
I had six or seven real, honest to goodness contractions yesterday at the basketball game. They piddled out when I got in a hot bath at home but it's nice to know the body is tuning up.
Typing awaits so I will end this...just wanted to say still here, still pregnant, and still doing well.
Everyone in town is sick
No big shock then that I have caught another cold. Fingers crossed it passes before the baby comes. I am less than amused but at least it is not the stomach bug that is going around.
I have an OB appt next week. It will probably be my last one as I don't usually do weekly appointments unless there is something wrong. How weird to know that I have less than a month of ever being pregnant. The Canadian continues to take whatever I throw at him without blinking.
Hubster wanted to go to a car show tomorrow but I don't think we will. It is 3 hours away and would involve a ton of walking. Not smart at 37 weeks pregnant. We can go next year. Instead we are going birthday shopping for boy #2 and going to see a movie...Mama...which looks really good and scary. We will be in the town I will deliver in all day so that is good just in case something happens, which I'm sure it will not.
I had six or seven real, honest to goodness contractions yesterday at the basketball game. They piddled out when I got in a hot bath at home but it's nice to know the body is tuning up.
Typing awaits so I will end this...just wanted to say still here, still pregnant, and still doing well.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Updated picture of the great white whale
Any guesses on size? I think 8 to 9 pounds if we go to 40 weeks.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Time keeps on slipping.....
Come on...you know that title has you singing the song. No? Ok so I am the only crazy one.
Where have I been? EGADS...busy is the only way to sum it up. I finally recovered from the cold of doom and can breathe again so that's good. The boy has played in 87 kajillion basketball games (slight exaggeration, but only slight), I have been working at the lab, typing at night, solving that pesky world peace problem in between (ok, ok, another slight exaggeration). It's all been good, just busy. We've been seeing boy #1 every Sunday which is weird but good. He went down the wrong path many years ago and has not been a part of our life much ever since so it's nice to have him around again but just takes some adjusting to. We've also been seeing girl #2 and the grandbaby every weekend which is really nice. But all this adds up to a very full, busy, hectic life and add to that the fact that I'm almost 36 weeks pregnant and you might be able to understand my life a bit.
I have maybe two more OB appointments to go (no, I don't do the weekly appointments, I am bad). The guys have booked their flights and motel. We are on the final countdown. I still feel really good. I'm uncomfortable and the baby is a huge octopus with arms in my cervix and legs is my ribs but he's healthy and that's all that matters.
Mycotoxin issues continue to consume my life in the lab, taking up about 3 hours a day. I wish it would start raining now and continue to rain every day for a month to resolve this drought but I don't see that happening so I think the mycotoxin issues will continue. It makes for busy, busy days with absolutely no chance to sit down and we rarely even get a lunch break, meaning we have become adept at eating on the run and packing lunches that can be consume on the run.
Better end this and get my hiney in gear...typing awaits.
Where have I been? EGADS...busy is the only way to sum it up. I finally recovered from the cold of doom and can breathe again so that's good. The boy has played in 87 kajillion basketball games (slight exaggeration, but only slight), I have been working at the lab, typing at night, solving that pesky world peace problem in between (ok, ok, another slight exaggeration). It's all been good, just busy. We've been seeing boy #1 every Sunday which is weird but good. He went down the wrong path many years ago and has not been a part of our life much ever since so it's nice to have him around again but just takes some adjusting to. We've also been seeing girl #2 and the grandbaby every weekend which is really nice. But all this adds up to a very full, busy, hectic life and add to that the fact that I'm almost 36 weeks pregnant and you might be able to understand my life a bit.
I have maybe two more OB appointments to go (no, I don't do the weekly appointments, I am bad). The guys have booked their flights and motel. We are on the final countdown. I still feel really good. I'm uncomfortable and the baby is a huge octopus with arms in my cervix and legs is my ribs but he's healthy and that's all that matters.
Mycotoxin issues continue to consume my life in the lab, taking up about 3 hours a day. I wish it would start raining now and continue to rain every day for a month to resolve this drought but I don't see that happening so I think the mycotoxin issues will continue. It makes for busy, busy days with absolutely no chance to sit down and we rarely even get a lunch break, meaning we have become adept at eating on the run and packing lunches that can be consume on the run.
Better end this and get my hiney in gear...typing awaits.
Sunday, January 6, 2013
On final approach
We are nearing the end here folks. C-section is scheduled. We have discussed labor, delivery, breastfeeding (I will be breastfeeding the baby in the hospital and then pumping afterwards). I have asked off for work, have my release to return to work that the doctor has to sign, have my "master plan" in my head for how my life will go after, have a set of triplets that I will be pumping for after the Canadian goes home. I'm as ready as I will ever be. And yet part of me is already shriveling up....how do you say goodbye to a large part of who you are. How do you sum up a year and a half of friendship and partnership and close it out and move on. I've done it three times before. I can and will do it again. I am not sad, I am just...I don't know. Other surrogates get it...no one else really can. The end of a great adventure is near, with all the drastic shifts that that entails. All I can do is sit by and wait and watch and try to be prepared for the storm of emotions that are approaching. Here we go again folks...one last time.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Blindingly white
Beware....my belly is as white as a blizzard but here it is in all it's glory...33w2d. Egads. The end is not in sight yet but it's just over the next hill.
We made it
To 2013 that is. I can now say "the baby is due next month." I can also now breathe a sigh of relief since my deductible on my health insurance is 1500 dollars instead of 8,000 so the guys are now getting a "discount baby" so to speak. Woo hoo.
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