Saturday, June 12, 2010

On the edge of tears

I honestly don't know what is wrong with me. I seem to cry at the drop of the hat lately. I cried today watching the Karate Kid. I cried reading a birth story on a blog about a homebirth. Then I cried reading a post on SMO about a lady whose surrogate baby died in utero at 30 weeks. I feel like my emotions are so close to the surface. I love to feel this baby move but every time it does I think of his/her dads and then I get sad thinking of the battle they are waging. I get sad thinking about all the what ifs. I know it is just hormones combined with several truly sucky things going on to those around me. But I've never been much of a crier so it feels very out of character for me. I'm trying to just let the tears come....hoping that things will get better with a little release. I have much to be thankful for and happy about and I try to remember that also. I am mostly a positive person so I know that this too shall pass.

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